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Children steal. Why?

 

If you ask: “if any of you dear parents that their children grew up a thief?” Probably would answer: “Yes God forbid!” And then you will tell the child that stealing is wrong, for it put him in prison. But after an hour or two, to the annoyance of ads for expensive cars that hit you in the midst of an interesting film, involuntarily exclaim that an honest man, and a lifetime won’t earn as much…

And then you’ll come to “spark” your friend and tell how his neighbor is well settled “drives” abroad copper wire, and have built a house in Cyprus. And the kids hear everything and wound on a mustache. How in such situation to bring honesty? How to develop native Chad hard immunity to other people’s things?

Indeed, it is difficult to understand a grown man, why are his child. which the commandment “thou shalt Not steal” was invested in the ears with very tender age, yesterday suddenly brought from kindergarten someone else’s toy. “Today he pulls the thing out of my pocket, and tomorrow what? – drain the family Bank!” And an angry parent is taken for the belt. To beat a child and scold him, not the solution. It is best to talk to him heart to heart and try. Knowing that steals the child and then how to dispose of stolen, it is easier to answer the question why he does it.

Stealing from children can be considered in three aspects:

a) social;

b) biomedical;

b) psychological.

Social aspect.

Stealing is an offence. But the criminal responsibility comes with age. What to do up to this point, if a child was caught stealing more than once or twice? The most effective lead him to the children’s room of militia and to put on record. Step is justified, especially if the child is using the theft tries to socialize in an anti-social family or teen group. Social teachers, psychologists, police officers will help him to develop social contacts that will help them to acquire a profession. But what if a child steals from family members, and parents are struggling to avoid publicity. And not without reason – will gain a lot of examples, when theft was the cause of expulsion from prestigious specialized classes

public schools.

Medical-biological aspect.

Applies to diseases such as kleptomania. Diagnostic criteria are:

– recurring to the subject of irresistible impulses to steal objects when not needed for personal use and which have no material value;

– increased sense of tension immediately before committing the theft

– pleasure or relief at the time of the theft, but later you may experience feelings of guilt or anxiety

stealing is not committed as an act of anger or revenge

stealing is not associated with a violation of conduct or personality disorder, antisocial type.

Kleptomania occurs in children is extremely rare. If it occurs, it is mainly the child with organic brain damage. This is manifested, as a rule, Cerebro-asthenic syndrome (loss of memory, attention, fatigue, headaches), infantilism, impulsiveness and disinhibition in behavior.

The psychological aspect.

Analysts pay special attention to the theft of children and adolescents, particularly in its symbolic aspect.

Experts identify seven categories of uniting theft, namely:

– method of restoring the lost relationship

– mother-child

– act of aggression

– protection from fear

– the way to get penalized

– method of recovering or enhancing of self-esteem

– reaction to a family secret.

– immature volitional behavior.

Remember.

In relationships with significant others older children in difficult situations demonstrate the helplessness and dependence and prone to different forms of response, one of which may well be stealing.

At first glance, the motives are absent, in fact, the motives for committing theft in such cases are not recognized and deeply hidden in the subconscious.

Tips for parents of preschoolers.

– never throw a “showdown under the hot hand” with haste, giving vent to his indignation, you can spoil your child’s life, depriving him of his confidence in the right to good treatment of others, and thus confidence. If the baby “is not caught by the hand”, despite any suspicions, remember about the presumption of innocence;

– never accuse a child of stealing, even if, apart from him, nobody else. The exception is when you caught him at the scene, but in this case, your choice of words. Let him know how you are upset. A quiet conversation, a discussion of your feelings, joint search for solutions to any problem better clarify the relationship;

– leave the kid the way to retreat. If you are sure that the thing he took, but it’s hard for him to admit it, tell me that the thing can quietly put into place.

– the child should be taught to stand in the place of another. He must feel that everyone has the right to support;

– to find the child another toy that he stole from a friend, but he argues that she presented to him, to say this: “I can imagine how much you wanted the doll, if you really believed that you gave her”;

– some parents in the hearts of the hit children’s hands, saying that in ancient times for theft thieves cut off the hands and threatening to take them to the police. It hardens children, creates a sense of his own malice;

– note how the family money is kept, it should not be readily available, do not provoke the child;

– the child must understand that there are things that belong personally to each member of the family. It is necessary to establish the boundaries of the property: what you can use and dispose of at their discretion and what is not (including public things).

Tips for parents of schoolchildren.

– do not provoke the child, leaving valuables unattended;

get out of your relationship with the child, the existence of negative attention to him, replacing them with such a natural concern for him;

– become your child’s role model, show him what you feel and perceive yourself a good and responsible that you can take care of yourself and that you can’t provoke negative attention towards son or daughter. Having you as such a model, the child gradually starts to feel too good and responsible, and he will no longer need to steal to prove otherwise;

– items that the child “finds”, it is better not to leave his property and return to where they were “found”;

– punishment should be inevitable, persuade the child to apologize and return the stolen item;

– if the theft occurred repeatedly, you need to analyze the situation to determine the right cause of repeat;

– be attentive to the circumstances of the theft: “what are the theft in time? If they do not match with any conflict in the child’s life or with periods of low mood, poor sleep? Not complaining about whether the child in this period headaches more often than usual or steals more often towards the end of the school term or after diseases?” Perhaps adjusting mode, you’ll be able to stop the theft.

– if no reasonable explanation as to the theft cannot be found and all measures have failed, contact your psychologist, if necessary, he may recommend to address to the psychotherapist.

– the child must understand that there are things that belong personally to each member of the family. It is necessary to establish the boundaries of the property: what you can use and dispose of at their discretion and what is not (including public things).